Procrastinating is terrible I admit, but I’m going to make excuses.  My head has been all over the place and I’ve been stressed out.  No good having a stressed out Phlossie. Not fun. 

Right now I’m feeling a heap more positive and have totally got the shakes from the "expresso/hot chocolate" I had this monring on an empty stomach.  ooops.  Too strong.

I’m organising a troupe to perfom at God’s Kitchen.  It has been the biggest Headache ever.  I went after the job TOTALLY not expecting what I was going to get into.  I’m not going into details.  However its simple enough to say I’m not doing another big even unless I can EITHER have full control of the costume design OR I see eye to eye with what the client wants.  Haha Ah well one more day till D day.  I’m expecting the event to be a pile of fun still, but the prep was a little frazzling. I asked for it tho.

The Nz Music awards are next week too and on a WEDNESDAY!  Who the hell puts a big industry party and after booze up on a midweek day.  Yea some of us are professional entertainers/ musicians… but some of us have day jobs and a life to maintain!!  Eeeek.    Thursday might just be hangover day for me. 
I’d take a leave day off, but I’m saving up my holidays HAHA!

Anyway.  I finally got a $50 westfielf voucher for work.  Its a monthly "R&R" thingy which I basically I think is bullshit but $50 is still $50.  Which in my language = a new manicure/ nails and possibly a massage.  I’m in terrible need of one.  I’m always damn well giving them out to other people and currently I have a MASSIVE one in my right shoulder.  Figures since I over use my mouse, and sleep on my side.

*laughs at my self* my fingers have still got the caffeene shakes. 

I want be self sufficient and self supporting.  I hate being an employee, but I see it as a means to an end till I become my own boss.  I’m going to work my ass off till I get there tho. 

Anyway I’m going to make a big announcement next week too!  I’m SUPER excited about it and I don’t want to loose the momentum I’ve got in my head.  An idea shared is one step closer to making it happen.  I’ll be contacting performers, photographers, businesses and Clubs soon.
A chocolate fish if you guess what its all about! haha
I have a dream – its a dream that doesn’t go away.

I want to have my own princess castle. I want to have the time to be "MYSELF" everyday not just on the weekends.  I want to stop "toning it down" for work or other people.  I want to have a million things going on at once so I forget to eat.  I want to own a pink vintage Vespa scooter. I want to legally change my name.  I want to not sleep for three days. I want live it like a Rock Star.  I want to make a glamorous life a reality.  I want to get lazer hair removal.  I want to move to Melbourne, Aust.   I want to be admitted to Rehab, just so I can know what its like.  I want to have an army of pink hatted GNOMES in my garden.  I want to live in an inner city appartment.  I want to be happy and poor before I get happy and rich.  I want to educate myself. I want to live like a hippie. I want to be single again. I want to do every crazy thing out there. I want to streak accross a rugby field. I want to walk on a high fashion runway. I want to get more tattoo’s.   I want to get pink and black extensions.  I want to live in the states for a year.  I want to grow old not regretting anything.  I want to do something so rediculously scandalous that it makes the front page of the national news paper.   I want a bed that looks like a marshmellow.   I want to take as many people with me on my crazy journey as possible. 

Am I mad?  Or is it just the voices in my head?
Narcissitic Journalism?


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